Occupation: Cat.
Occupation: Cat.
Salary: Nothing. Because you don't need to buy anything.
Person Specification: Must be furry.
Duties Include: Sleeping, eating, chasing things, turning your nose up at food and ensuring that all flowerbeds contain at least one poo.
Please be aware, this job involves a lot of lounging around, meowing loudly when your requests are not instantly met, and making sure that every bit of furniture has got your claw / teeth / paw marks on it. When you are lounging, you must pay particular attention when the humans walk by, to stretch out and look more comfortable than they ever knew possible. You will get extra brownie points if you do this just as they set off for work.
You must reject all affection when the humans want it, but do make sure you give them that one rare cuddle when they are in the middle of something important.
Lastly, when the humans warn you it is raining outside and you don't believe them, you must make a point of shouting very loudly at them when you come back inside, soaking wet. Why didn't they tell you it was so wet outside? Bad humans.
Ha! Anyway. Have a fab weekend everyone (it must be Friday by now, surely!?) and I'll see you soon!
Much love,
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